In the news thread

They’re already talking about “local” or regional returns to lockdown if there’s outbreaks again. In theory it’s what track and trace is meant for but I doubt our implementation of it will work

Said it before, but AIDS is a virus and they said they’d have a vaccine for that within the year.

Big difference is you can’t get AIDS from your gran (hopefully).

From this article our contact-tracing app doesn’t sound too effective.

The UK have decided to decided to build our own app, without using the Google & Apple API.

The core issue is one familiar to mobile security experts: app permissions. Contact-tracing apps use Bluetooth to create a log of nearby devices using the app, and, by extension, people with whom users have come into contact…The problem is that both Google and Apple restrict how apps can use Bluetooth in iOS and Android. They don’t allow developers to constantly broadcast Bluetooth signals.
iOS apps can only send Bluetooth signals when the app is running in the foreground. If your iPhone is locked or you’re not looking at the app, then there’s no signal. The latest versions of Android have similar restrictions, only allowing Bluetooth signals to be sent out for a few minutes after an app has closed. Such restrictions will block devices from pinging one another in close quarters, drastically reducing the effectiveness of any contact-tracing app.

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Yep, I know what you’re saying, but bunting. Fuck. That.

I’m guessing she means Stockwell.

Shouldn’t she be out looking for her daughter instead or something?

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My and my Mrs have said even if they lift some of the restrictions we will stoll carry on as we have been. My work is taking every precaution they can. I work on my own, doing hand overs in the car park and I avoid the security guard at all costs.

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Some new slogans, just to add to the confusion:

Stay alert? What? It’s like watching a group of chancers trying to blag a presentation. They wouldn’t last 5 minutes on dragon’s den

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Stay alert everyone!

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Youll need 5G to stay alert…

Pretty sure we’ll be continuing as we are whatever is announced tonight, except I might feel a bit less guilty about getting out for a run and a walk on the same day. We’ve already both been told from work that we’re to do the same tomorrow as we have for the last seven weeks, and logistically it’s gonna be a while before our offices can open up anyway. Plus to stick to the two metres rule at work I don’t reckon we’ll be able to have more than about 30% staff in. Plus plus the nursery is gonna still be closed.

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absolutely crackers this, doesn’t actually mean anything

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Our director sent an email saying we are going to carry on as we are, for the safety of staff. I get the impression they want to see how things pan out before making any decisions. Staff safety is a priority

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Yeah, same. And the way it should be. I feel really lucky tbh.

So Boris is going on TV tonight to let us know what’s happening with the new lockdown easing? I bet it’ll be more confusing than that new sign (which Scotland and Wales are refusing to use as it’s laughable).

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This government has totally embarrassed itself.

So that’s what it means.

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Have you been given a date for that yet?

That sign basically says, ‘Well, you’ve got the information so try to behave, but if you don’t and you die it’s not our fault now’.

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Holy shit. Breaking news: water is wet

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Ah man I feel for you. Pretty certain my 85 year old grandad and definitely my dad are not paying any attention to any social distancing advice. Either head on the sand or they just don’t want to belive it will affect them.

‘Stay alert’ is just a full green light for too many people. He’s going to kill people with whatever shit he’s about to announce tonight (pre-recorded, the spineless shit cunt).

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