Hold it all until an hour before the presentation. Then blast it all out. Hopefully you can then ride out the public speaking on the euphoric high of empty an bowel.
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I find adrenaline usually kicks in but then you get a 5 minute window post-op to beeline for the bogs.
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Strap a bin bag to your arse so if you need to shit yourself during the presentation you can just take a pause and let rip, then carry on like nothing happened
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Can always rely on the members of this forum for good practice advice.
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I’ve given a copy of my notes to the co-presenter and said if I need to dash mid way she can take over. Might be better than @h_palmer627 ’s bin bag approach.
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Managed to stay awake and, not checked yet but, pretty sure I didn’t shit myself. All you can ask for really.
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Stay awake and don’t shit yourself. Life lessons right there.
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Fuck fireworks
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Yeah, I hear you.
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Come again? I can’t hear you over the fireworks
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I have hated them since my brother nearly fucking blinded me with a rocket a few years ago.
Although bonus tonight skating a spot outside a tower block so was good noise cover.
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Dog is wedged under the dining table shaking, well, like a shitting dog.
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I was just out in the car and saw a little spaniel legging it about in the road, must have got frightened. Followed it for a bit and managed to get in front, get out and get it to come to me. Luckily after a minute its owner came flying round on a bike.
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That’s how our friend lost their spaniel last year. Ran off and was hit by a car a few miles away from where we were staying. Shite.
Our spaniel is just barking every time one goes off. Losing my shit here 
Yo on behalf of all dog owners everywhere: good man.
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Was just going to type the same thing, but I also thought if I did it, with my luck sometimes, I would have probably ended up running the dog over myself
Good man
Our doggo (Murphy, the golden retriever) was a real champ last night what with it being like downtown Basra. He got a bit nervous at one point and hid under the coffee table but all in all some cuddles on the couch settled him and we shoved on a YouTube video of squirrels to keep him occupied
My cane corso Dennis couldn’t give a fuck about the fireworks. Even in the garden he just acts like there aren’t bombs going off around him. However, I still fucking hate fireworks and feel sorry for all animals that are spooked by them. They were going from 5-11pm near my house yesterday. It was so fucked
